I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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