gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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