So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
