A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
