Christians are straight up FREAKS
Need sex. Gaining weight.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Randomize
