i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
PANTIES FOUND
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