We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
