Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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