I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
