have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
