don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
