I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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