yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
