I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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