She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
