So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
