Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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