4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Randomize
