This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
