i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I wish i was in the wii world.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
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