You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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