So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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