Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Randomize
