No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
