talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
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