i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
