and she was petting her beer can
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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