Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I have post one night stand depression
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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