so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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