we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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