wake up i wanna do it froggy style
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
