would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
