It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
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