I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
