I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
