I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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