she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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