final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
