I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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