she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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