Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
