Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
