God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
