so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
