Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
so let's talk penis.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
