google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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