Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
