The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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