she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
