It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
